No Boundarys A Noel Olken Show 9/11/11

Hi Everyone, I am starting another post with an apology for not posting since March. Seems like there is always so much going on and stopping to write about it doesn't happen.

But there is something going on now I do want to tell you about. I am doing my first stage show in a long time. It is called No Boundarys A Noel Olken Show 9/11/11. It is going to happen on 9/11/11, as the title suggests. I know you must be thinking it has something to do with 9/11. Well, yes and no.

I created a Kickstarter project to raise money to produce the play. This is what the project looks like on Kickstarter. You can get to the Kickstarter project page and watch the pledge video here: http://kck.st/nG7C1m

Here is what it says...

"Actually it's about life, death, and camping. Mostly life, some death, and a lot of camping.

It has a lot of strange twists and turns and will surprise you with an unexpected ending.

While preparing for a canoe trip to the Boundary Waters of northern Minnesota, Noel Olken discovers some strange things in his pack. What are these things and why does he still carry them? Where did they come from? And will he ever get over the strange events of his last trip up north?

Performed by, and written by Noel Olken, this autobiographical tale will intrigue, amuse and maybe even shock you. Because truth IS stranger than fiction. And when it comes to baggage, we all have some.

This performance will take place on one night only, September 11, 2011 at the Victory Theatre in Burbank, CA. It will be performed on The Little Victory stage.

THE LITTLE VICTORY
3324 West Victory Blvd, Burbank, CA 91505
box office: 818.841.5422

Consider your pledge of $10 or more as an advance ticket purchase. If I don't reach my goal I will still be doing the show on 9/11/11. But if I reach my goal it will be a lot more fun for all of us.

This is my first one person show since Coffee Time, performed at Lower Links in Chicago, IL in 1993.

Thank you for your support. As you can see, I am only giving myself 16 days to raise my goal. Please consider pledging now and spreading the word to your friends on Face Book at the No Boundarys event page. While you are there you can friend me."

I hope you will consider making a pledge, or buying a ticket and coming to see the show. if you can't see the show maybe you will pledge anyway and I'll give the ticket to an unemployed actor or truck driver or banker.

In any event, this is what I am doing with my life right now and I am very excited about it and really hope you get to see it. Thank you. I hope you are well and thriving. Living your dreams and making each day wonderful.

Noel

Get Off The Phone!

I was recently pulled over on the freeway in Los Angeles for talking on a phone while driving. I was holding a "phone" in my hand, that's true, but I wasn't talking.

Like most states these days, talking while driving is a ticket-able offense, and in California the fine can be anywhere from 150 - 200 dollars. That's a lot of money. But you know the awful feeling you get when you are about to be pulled over by the cops? Well, I wasn't feeling it. In fact, I was laughing so hard, and the passenger in the van with me was laughing so hard, it was like a funny movie.

I was coming back from a catering gig in Beverly Hills, a brunch for some Hollywood royalty, and I had been up since 5 AM. It was a slightly over the top brunch that was rather quick and mostly painless. Our "kitchen" was on the loading dock of a BH office building. As the dumpsters were right next to us on the dock, when I was throwing some trash away I saw a box with some office supplies. As I am a recovering scrounger, I couldn't help but check out the contents; there were some old computer cables, a paper tray, some old files, and lookie here, an old telephone handset. I grabbed a cable and the handset and sticking one end of the cable into my apron pocket, I held the phone and pretended to be talking on my "new cell phone". Very funny right? Ha ha.

So as I'm driving the van back to the shop I'm goofing around with the handset. I admit I like having an audience (Kris says that why I married her) so I like that the chef, Jen, was cracking up every time I pulled up at a red light and pretended to talk on my "phone" for other drivers to see me.

So we're on the 10 East heading towards downtown and I see I'm about to pass a co-workers car, so I slowed down and pulled beside Micah and Rachel and pretended to talk on my "phone". All of a sudden a CHP car pulls next to Micah's car and looks at me on the "phone".

I put down the phone pretty quick, but the squad car maneuvers behind me, and I see Rachel in the other car look freaked out. The lights come on and I hear the cop tell me to pull over at the next exit.

We were on the 10 E heading into the 110 North interchange where there is no easy exit for a few miles. So the officer is following me in this slow traffic on the interchange and Jen is cracking up and we are laughing and I am not bothered at all by this hilarious situation.

He finally directs me to exit at 9th Street and pull over. He gets out of his car and walks over to the passenger side of the van. Jen rolls down her window and he says " Do you know why I pulled you over? You were talking on a cell phone."

I reached over to the center console and picked up the handset and said, "You mean this?"

I so wish I had a picture of his face when he saw the cordless handset. It was classic. It was a combination of shock, surprise, and embarrassment. I could see he was quickly trying to assess how much the others CHIPS would make fun of him if he wrote me a ticket.

I started telling him that we are coming back from a catering gig and I found this phone and I was goofing around with a co-worker and I wasn't really talking on the phone.

Then he asks, "Do you have a cell phone in the car"? Yes, but its in my pocket.

Let me see your license. He looks at it and writes something on a piece of paper and says, "You're lucky, I'm gonna let you off with a warning". Then he asks if I know how to get back on the freeway from here. He was very nice.

Now I agree it was nice he let me go without a ticket, but I wonder what he could have written a ticket for? Illegal use of a hand prop? Aggravated mimery? Clowning with a permit?

I have been living in LA for five years and that was the first time I have been pulled over by the cops. I hope it will always be so pleasant.

Safe driving everyone!

(staged photo re-enactment by Rachel Rath)

Holy Fuck has it been a long time since I wrote any thing here!

Love, Noel

Only 5 more months to Human Trafficking day!

I last wrote on 1/11. Today is 8/11. Human Trafficking awareness day is 1/11. Wow.

Well, human trafficking has become a part of my life again. I'm raising money on Kickstarter now to release my film, Meditations On Trafficking, on DVD. Its going okay, but we have a long way to go. Here is a link it: http://kck.st/af0Ql9

It has been a number of years since I did all my research into trafficking, and I'm glad to say, now that I am back to it again, that it is easier to find more. I guess that could also be seen as a negative. Is there more trafficking than there was nine years ago? Seems like it. Or did they just not see it all

With the world economy the way it is, it sure seems like there would be more crime overall, and trafficking is a crime, first, and a despicable act second.

So, if they know where all this trafficking is going on, and if they know where it takes place, and if they know who is doing it....why can't they simply stop it?

I truly believe if we wanted, as a nation, as a superpower, as a planet, to eliminate trafficking, we could do it. But who has the patience to focus on one thing at a time and actually make a difference in the world. That's what its gonna take.

Well, stopping it is simply not in the best interest of the masters of the universe. They like a little seemliness around the edges. They like a little nookie too, once in a while, and they like it when someone else gets their hands dirty.

Human trafficking takes place to feed the sexual appetite of men worldwide. Not poor men, or colored men, or skinny men or fat men, not rich men or poor man, just men.

And so it is, men want hookers, and there just isn't enough to go around. So they have to procure it. Like the vampires on True Blood. They take it. Unlike Vampires, traffickers have absolutely no redeeming qualities what-so-ever.

I hate traffickers. I hope they all die.

What a day!

01/11/10 oh one one one one oh

woke up in a funk. A bit tense. Uneasy. A lot going on. I'm sure sex crossed my mind. but Kris was still sleeping.

as I made coffee, I was obsessed with the idea of divisiveness in our country. Like it's still the Civil War. Got it out of my system with a post on FB. For now.

It got better. All in all, it was a very productive day.

Coffee and tea with Kris. That's where we sit on the couch, our feet up, she with her tea, I with my coffee. We talk, we laugh, we joke, we play, we fight, we make up, we pinch each other.

went to the mancave - my windowless garage office:

emails
facebook
car research, more.
edit autotrader car ad

Breakfast with Kris. Mmmm, Kris!

after breakfast:

on-line banking - ugh.

vacuum car and clean out all the crevices

craig's list ads for video/film jobs

research dvd ripping software
download a shareware trail version and check it out:
rip a scene from 7 Greatest Bathrooms to test product, pretty good
buy it, start prep for new acting reel

peruse actors access for acting jobs

LA Casting to check on tomorrows time for a look-see

listen to air america - hartmann and rhodes

install a light on the garage in the driveway

go to carmax and see how much they will buy my car for -
- talk about "stealing the trade".
- They must have really not wanted it.

stop at the hardware store to by a daylight sensor for the new light over the garage

stop at a bank - deposit a check.

return home.
get mail

check email

rake leaves in front garden, clean up new seating area, prep flower beds
take garbage and recycling bins to the curb

say hello to neighbor

say hello to Lucky next door

listen to Tom Horne's "word salad"

buy some new music on itunes, Kings Of Leon, Arcade Fire, The Dodos

Got obsessed with the idea that I had to forgive everyone in my life who I ever had any anger towards. So I did. I just forgave them all. And myself. Let it go.

checked email

Watch the 450th Simpson's episode

Watch the 20th Anniversary special

go back to the mancave and write some more

Kris just got home, gotta go

The horse is dead, you can stop beating it.

Americans are so body conscious...or should I say hung-up. That's it. Hey, America; why are you so HUNG UP!

Rather than focus on the bigger problem of Whole Body Scanning (x-raying) all domestic air travelers, some American's are getting hung up on the idea that they will be seen naked.

That is scary. We should be scared. First, it's going to be the TSA. And we all have experienced the pleasure of the TSA. If ever there was a profession that was tailor fit for dementors, it would be with the TSA. They can suck the life out of you pretty easily.

And the first thing I thought was what does this picture look like? What are they seeing? If it's going to be anything like seeing a fat woman at the mall in skin tights pants, I hope they get paid well for that. It may lead to a new disease. Fatosis - Fatty and psychosis. From seeing too many fatties.

Yeah, that's right people, you should be scared. Some eighteen dollar an hour TSA worker will be looking at all your junk and deciding if you need a pat down or not. This is the same worker who can't join a union. Thank you Sen. Jim DeMint (R-S.C.) Sen Jim believes if TSA unionizes it will be easier for terrorists to get past the TSA. Huh? What have you been smoking, Jim? Feeling paranoid? Are there spiders on the wall? Dude, you're tripping.

If I worked for the TSA, yeah now that's a thought, but if I did, I might like that there is now a new way to fuck with people. Or maybe, during a pat down, you might meet someone?

So, no one knows which way this thing is gonna go. Will all passengers have to go through it? Only certain passengers as a secondary screener? Does that mean profiling? And really, don't we do that already. Do we really need to pull Grandma and Grandpa out of line? Is Joan Rivers really a threat? And which passengers are we really talking about? Your children? A new born? A down syndrome adult? Only middle eastern men?

Have you ever been interrogated at an airport by an Israeli security agent? I was, in Amsterdam. They get in your face and they look at you. They look at you up and down and they see you better than any body scan machine. They do a brain scan, and they do a damn fine job. If you got a bomb on your junk - they're gonna know it.

So why don't we have that level of security guards? Why don't we have screeners who are trained professionals? Who wear well fit designer suits and look like they all could kill you by twitching. Well, most likely because they are well trained, well paid, and the job comes with good benefits. Ah, with health care! That costs money. No we can't do that. We can't put the money into people! No, instead Americans build a cheap ass machine, as cheap as possible, and then put low paid workers with little training in front of the monitors.

But Israel trains their people and then they send them out into the world to train others and perform those same tasks for other countries who don't or won't do it themselves. And they do it because we pay for it. Time we paid for it here!

And if they ram this down our throats, you know they are gonna need to sell it to us Madison Avenue style.

Christ, I see it now. Fox evening news; "here's a smiling baby, held by a beautiful smiling young conservative mother going through the body scan. See, its easy." And the zombie talking heads will then make a bad joke about a poopie diaper, and we'll all laugh, and it will be okay.

I'm gonna puke. Then I'm gonna eat my puke so I can puke again. Fuck heads.

Speaking of how many of us fly in America, I looked around, and I found these numbers:

1 "Published: June 25, 1997
"AIRLINE passenger loads show no signs of easing, and in fact carriers have already boarded millions more passengers this year than last, when a record 581.2 million passengers flew."


2 "the airlines carried 745.7 million passengers on their total systems during 2005, up from the 712.6 million carried in 2004. During the first nine months of 2005, U.S. airlines carried 5.9 percent


3 "Bureau of Transportation - RITA - Total On-Flight Market Passengers Enplaned 468,777,039

So, 1996 - 581.2 million passengers. 2005 - 745.7 million passengers. 2009 - 468.7 million passengers

So that means that air travel is below levels last seen in 1996. And what does that mean? I haven't a clue. But I do know this; if everyone has to go through a scan, it is going to be a drag for everybody.(©noelolken)

For some people it will be on grounds of invasion of privacy. For some the radiation levels are a concern. For some it's civil liberties. For some, it's a religious issue. For some it will be the extra time it will take. So many reasons.

I hope America comes to it's senses soon. Why do we all have to go through this when the incident that started it, as serious as it is, didn't originate in this country, and probably wouldn't have been detected by this machine anyway. So why are we doing this? There is a grayed out area that covers the "junk". So what would that have done? Is it too cynical to think that it's just to sell machines? Who is gonna get these contracts and how much will it be worth? And will the machines be made here in America? Or will they be made overseas? China? The horse is dead, you can stop beating it.

ABC's Aaron Katersky Reports: "On June 4, 2009 the U.S. House of Representatives passed a bill, H.R. 2200, that would limit the use of whole-body imaging (WBI) systems in airports."

Wow! Only six months ago they got shut down by the Congress, that bold group of leaders we call Politicians. It goes on..."The amendment prohibits the use of full-body scanners as a primary screening method. They can be used as secondary screening and in such a case “would require the TSA to give passengers the option of a pat-down search in lieu of going through a WBI machine.”

Well that's nice, now we have options! Radiation or humiliation.

"We have a special today, radiation and a thorough pat down, comes with continental breakfast buffet only 6.99, cash or credit?"

Now I have to tell you, it may come as a surprise to some, but in my past I was profiled as a terrorist by many civilian and military police officers all over the world. Being a long haired, dark skin traveler in the 1980's in Europe just lent it self to that. Sure it was popular to travel, sure many people were doing it, but if you looked like me, you got pulled out of line a lot. If you were a bubbly blond with a Canadian flag sewn to your back pack, not so much.

One time I was taken off a train on my way to the airport in France, taken to a holding room at the station, and strip searched. Had my cavity examined. My anal cavity.

Once I was pushed up against the cold ceramic tile walls in a Parisian Metro station and had a machine gun thrust in my face.

Once I was terrorized by German Shepards as the police went through my vehicle.

The French Police had there way with me often, but I also had encounters with the German Police, the Swiss Police, Italian Polizei, and Greek officers. I was strip searched a total of three times, and countless pat downs and having my bags and pockets searched. It's not fun. And I was not a terrorist. Well, one cop in New Orleans must have thought my playing was a terrorist act - he arrested me for it.

So look, there are lots of reasons not to like this idea, but body image problems shouldn't really be a major one. If you got a problem with someone seeing your outline, maybe you ought to hit the gym.

I imagine there are lots of people who will like the experience. Get off on it. I wonder if it's against the law to look the screener right in the eye and wink, or lick your lips? If not, it probably will be. Gosh we love laws in this country. Think we have enough of them?

Hey this will make a good porn video. Vivid, if you're reading this and if you want my story, give me a call, I'd love to direct it. I could write the script tomorrow, we can shoot it over the weekend, we could get the DVD on line next Friday. Let's go. I'll cut my usual rate. I need work.

I know I won't fly anywhere soon unless I absolutely have to, but, sure, I'll do it, if I have to. Air travel is a privilege, not a right. If you don't want to do it, you don't have to. You can take a steamer to Paris. Go ahead. Book passage today. Prices are going up soon.©noelolken

The Untouchables - American style

I had a thought today that many Americans are becoming like the rag pickers of India. The Untouchables who go through the mountains of trash to find scraps of cloth or metal to eek out a meager living.

And what brought me to that thought? It wasn't the beggars on every corner. It wasn't the multitude of homeless people going through the trash. It wasn't the families working together to find cans and bottles to sell for cash. No, that is easy to see. No, it was...

The Internet. Yes, the Internet.

Let's face it, the Internet is cool, but it's also filled with so much garbage. You can find so many wonderful things on it, the whole sum of human existence is here somewhere, if you know where to look. So much creativity and beauty. But there is also a lot of garbage.

Some people are making a good living on the internet. Some have even become rich. And some people are like Untouchables.

Check this out. I'm selling my car right now using classified ads on the internet. Every response I've had so far has only been from someone trying to scam me, phish info on me, or sell me something. They got my info from the classified ads I posted. To do that, these people must cull through the ads, the piles and piles of ads (garbage) to find scraps of information (rags) to try to make a few pennies. If they get me to click on a link they send me, they might make a penny. If they get me to buy a service, they might get a commission. But it won't be a fortune, it won't even be enough to live on. It might be enough to subsist on. And tomorrow they will be going through the ads again looking for more rags. They aren't building anything. They aren't adding to the beauty of the world. They are just rag pickers, trying to stay alive one more day.

Another sign of the fall of the American Empire.

a quick note...

Been so long since I wrote, I thought a quick note to all my readers would be timely. What's up, peeps? How are you?

Very busy here in Noe-LA LA land, working a lot, catering to the needs of party goers in the LA area. Television directors, movie stars, and six year olds alike have received some awesome catering from yours truly.

Of course that's not why I'm here, it's just my day job. Still waiting for that big break thats right around the corner. I can feel it.

A short film I was in last year is on line, you can see it here...
http://www.vimeo.com/7424860

And a indie feature I am in called The Seven Greatest Bathrooms In LA, (I know) is available to purchase on line as well. Looking for my next project! Someone want to cast me in a movie?


My friend Lance got me hooked up with this movie that shot in Chicago last month, and that turned into an associate producer role on "The Return Of Joe Rich", a cool indie film starring Armand Assante and Talia Shire. The director, Sam Auster is here in LA and I'm going to continue working on the film through post production. It should be a cool little film.

As for my films, Explode is still being edited. I have some new ideas to make it more abstract and less linear, expand the story with the footage I already shot by adding a voice over. it's gonna be very cool.

My first film, Slave, has been re-edited and I changed the name back to my original title, Meditations On Trafficking. As soon as I can gather up a thousand dollars to make DVD's I'll be self distributing the film on the web.

So, we moved in October and finally found a cool little house in the Highland Park neighborhood of LA. Its just north of downtown, close to Pasadena. 20 minutes from Hollywood, and we hear roosters crowing in a nearby backyard!

We have less square footage than the loft, but Kris and I each have our own working space, separate from each other, so it feels like we have more usable space. I'm writing to you now from the "MAN-CAVE", the detached garage that is my office and work space. No windows, no sunlight, no distractions. It was converted into a recording studio by the previous tenant, so it's sound proofed and I can play my guitar as loud as I like. It was a hard move, it took us two days to move all our stuff, but now that we are settled in, it is really great. Come on out and visit.

Thanksgiving has come and gone, Kris had a birthday, and here we are less than three weeks from Christmas. Another year of living in Paradise!

Hope all is well in your world.

N

Where's the refrigerator?

It's moving time. We've been in our loft for three years now, and it's time for a change. Mostly to lower our rent, but also for a change. Loft living is cool, but it has its drawbacks.

So I'm reminded of another curious thing about Los Angeles? Not every rental apartment comes with a refrigerator. Yes, I know that's odd, being from "back east". When I first moved here and looked at apartments, no one could really tell me why or how that started, just "...this apartment doesn't come with a refrigerator".

So, if you are a renter, you have to carry around a refrigerator with you when you move. I suppose you could leave it, I'm sure some people do. And what if you have a refrigerator and you move into a new place that has one already? I suppose you can sell yours, or ask the land lord to move his. If you do sell yours, and move again in a year, you may have to buy another one. It gets complicated. And if you find a really cool place and it doesn't have a fridge, would you really not take it because you have to spend a few hundred bucks on a fridge?

So as I scour Craig's List for our new apartment, I study the pictures of the kitchen closely. Is there a big empty space under the cabinet or not? Does it say refrigerator included? I even saw an ad today that says, " Comes with a gas stove!" Wow, really. The apartment comes with a stove? How nice.

We still haven't found where we are going to move to yet, but we have started the best part of moving...the Purge! Getting rid of stuff. Eliminating clutter before you move it. Going through everything you own and asking yourself, "Do I still want this?"

We started today, going through files and paperwork. I must have cleared at least thirty pounds of old paper from my file cabinets. Old bank statements, bills and receipts. And it's just the beginning. Oh, yeah, it feels real good. This time I made a promise; I will be brutal, I will be unrepentant in my purging, and I will take no prisoners.

Going to the beach day!

Work. Work. Work. All I do is work. Fuck that, I'm going to the beach today with my beautiful wife who looks so hot in a bikini.

The rest can wait. Job? Who needs a job. Money? Who needs money.

Ring, ring. The bank is calling honey, they want your ass in a sling. Let 'em wait. The beach is calling.

Gotta give to me for one day.

Can I see your crapper, please?

We are currently looking for a new apartment and will be moving in about six weeks. How fun.

I spend a lot of time on Craig's List looking at what is available for rent now, and I am always surprised by how bad the pictures are that people post, to entice me to come look at their rental units.

For example, if there is a window in the kitchen; and you would be amazed at how many apartments they built in Los Angeles with galley kitchens that have no window, but if there is a window, they leave the blinds closed.

Then there are the people who post pictures of the bathroom. Really, the apartment comes with a crapper and indoor plumbing? Wow, I'll take it. Do you really think that showing me your plain jane sink and toilet will jazz me up enought to run out and see it? Ah, at least turn the light on?

Why don't you save the space CL gives you for four photos for something interesting, like built in cabinets, the fire place, a view from the balcony? Oh, because your crappy apartment doesn't have anything like that to offer.

As a former location scout, I know how hard it is to photograph a small bedroom. It's impossible. You see a small sliver of a room that only looks smaller because there is such a narrow angle. At least open the closet door and give it a little depth?

hey land lords, call me, for $100 bucks I'll come shoot your apartment and make it look interesting. Till then, what's the next crapper look like?

New Uniforms for Congress!

So here's my idea. All Senators and Congress People have to wear the logos of their corporate sponsors like race car drivers.

We need to see when a congress person or senator gets up to speak on CSPAN who they are owned by.

For example, when the good Senator from the Sate of Montana gets up to speak against single payer health care, it would be nice if we can clearly see on his "uniform" all the campaign contributions from the insurance companies, health care providers, or pharmaceutical companies that he has taken. The bigger the donation, the higher up and the bigger it is on his uniform.

I think this is an idea whose time has come.

New Post - 9/27/08

I didn't know what else to call this post. Its been almost three months since my last post, and there is so much to write about, so okay, let me just get into it.

In my last post on July 4th, I spoke about my new film, Explode. Well I am glad to say the film has wrapped principal photography and is in the can. We shot it in seven and a half days in September.

I held a casting session on August 28th for some of the principal roles, started shooting on Sept 9, and wrapped Sept. 25. We shot a few days a week, around my work schedule.

I'll write more about Explode's production in a future post. I think it could be a good read for anyone who wants to make a small movie with no money and no crew. (I had a crew of six, and some of them were only on the film one day.)

But for now, to my cast and crew, I can't thank you enough. Your participation in the film was remarkable, and means so much to me. I couldn't have made this film without the help of the amazing Kris Cahill, who took time away from her painting studio to help produce this film for me, Rita Hausberger, my DP, and Leila Perry, my wardrobe designer and costumer.

To Joe Estevez, Circus*Szalewski, and the other 21 actors with speaking roles in the film,(24 speaking parts in such a small movie!!!!) I can't say enough how much I appreciate your participation and what a remarkable job you all did under such difficult conditions.


When I started planning this film, I didn't expect to start a new career, finally hanging up my server's apron. Did I find a job in the entertainment field like I was looking for? Did I land a studio production job? No, not yet, but if anyone from a studio is reading this, I'm still available and ready to start tomorrow; no, I started a new career as a car salesman. A what? That's right, you heard me, an automobile car sales professional. I thought it would be interesting, and I hoped I could make more money than waiting tables. Hey, if you are in So Cal and are looking for a new or pre-owned vehicle, drop me a line.

So a new job, lots of uncertainty in the market, a collapsing economy, a contentious election, a world in turmoil, and what do I do? I make a small dramatic feature on credit cards. I am a nut, but a film nut who just has to do my own thing, make my own art, and not let anyone tell me I can't.

September was also a busy month for me as an actor, in that two films I shot in the last year were going to have premieres. One, the long anticipated The $179.92 Movie, premiered last Thursday in Hollywood. It was fun to see, and my three scenes looked great.

The other film, the much bigger Pirates 2: Stagnetti's Revenge, is calling itself the worlds most expensive and comprehensive adult feature in the world! With a cast of sexy superstars, Pirates 2 is already the most pre-ordered title ever. In fact, the movie is so popular, they are releasing an R rated version as well.

Tonights red carpet premiere and media event at a classic movie palace in downtown Los Angeles is going to be a blast. And guess what? You can see my character, Blind Ed, in the trailer - twice! Yeah, I'm in the trailer. First time a role I play is in the trailer for a film. But not the last time, I can tell you that. Here is a link to the Pirates 2 website, where you can see the trailer, but be warned, it is a XXX adult site.

So as you can see, its been a pretty busy month.

But I have time for more. So if you want to hire me to direct a feature, produce a feature, or star in your upcoming feature, please contact me. I'm ready to go.
Until then, I'll just keep working on the edit of Explode, and all the other projects I have going on, like the Kiss From Calcutta webisode project we start shooting again in October, and more ground breaking ideas from my fertile and creative mind.

Enjoy the trailer, and I'll be writing more soon about Explode and the whole production process, with photos and post production updates.

That's all for now,

Noel

Like a bad penny - I'm back!

Hey you all, how are you? I'm back again to fill this small box with words and ideas. Happy fourth of July to you? What are you doing today? I'm going to work, cause I'm free to work as much as I want. Hurray Amerika!

Thinking about so many things since I last wrote - months ago.

Very excited about Barack Obama being the democratic nominee for President. What a primary fight that was. I'm totally down with that. Really hoping that universal health care is in all our futures. Can't wait to see who will play at the inaugural dinner.

I've been thinking about trying my hand at stand up comedy. been going to see a few shows at The Improv on Melrose. Working on some new material now.

Also, and this is the most exciting, I'm getting ready to make a new movie. I'm writing, directing, producing, starring in, and composing the sound track. I'm gonna do it all and showcase my talents. I am going to take Hollywood by storm and NOW is the time! The film is called Explode! and its an existential crime thriller. I call it "Of Mice And Men meets Waiting For Godot meets Reservoir Dogs". Its gonna rock. I'm shooting it in August and hope to have it finished by the end of the year.

As an actor I have three films and a webisode in the can, completed, that I hope you will all get to see soon.

Okay, that's it, enough for my first day back. Off to work soon. Have a safe and happy fourth and remember democracy starts with you - tag you're it! Do something.

Restaurant dress code - High on Crack.

Hey all you hipsters out there, I got news for you. Wearing your pants low on your hips so your butt crack shows when you sit down is passe. Hitch up your pants when you sit down would you?

I was having a wonderful evening out with friends the other night, when just as our meal ended, a hipster couple comes in and sits down across from us. The male of the couple has his back to me and I can't help but notice his butt crack smiling at me from across the aisle. Eww! I don't want to look at that!

I wondered if there was a polite way to tell him his butt crack was hanging out in a public place, but I couldn't think of one. Like when a guys zipper is down, you say, "Your barn door is open". How about, "Excuse me bro, but your skinny ass is hanging out of your stupid perma-press plaid pants". Or, "Hey, are you a plumber?"

I wanted to take a picture, but instead I drew a picture on a napkin. I think I'm going to try to market it to restaurants worldwide. Maybe it should be posted next to the NO SMOKING signs. What do you think? Let's end this crack epidemic now. Crack Kills!

Day 9

Hello Everyone,

I'd like you to take a minute from your working out and stretching so I can tell you about mine. Today is day nine of the 30 day workout plan. I have been diligently working out everyday and I really feel the difference. I dropped two pounds and I feel great. It is becoming something I look forward to now and it really is habit forming.

If I was to do a commercial for working out, would I have to have the slick sounding voice over person come on and read the disclaimer?

"Warning: working out everyday can lead to better health and stamina, constant feelings of euphoria, restful sleep and great energy. Some exercisers have reported weight loss, mental clarity, loss of appetite, increased sexual desire, ability to stop taking pharmaceuticals, better breath, solid stools, renewed friendships, increased work promotions and more laughter. Other side effects may include more money in the bank, lack of fear and anxiety and longer life expectancy. Please consult a doctor before starting any workout regimen. If your doctor says you can't do it, find another doctor"

Now, back to your workout.

Cause I'm The Tax Man...

I was cast in a very fun video shoot as HR, as in HR Block, the tax preparation company. Seems they charge quite a bit for their services if you want a Refund Anticipation Loan (RAL). This documentary on RAL's by Karney Hatch will explain it all, in under five minutes, so you don't get taken advantage of. I had a lot of fun doing it and I hope you like it too. Check out Karney's other work at Current TV.

30 day workout program - begin!

Day 1: April 14, 2008

Last year I participated in a 12 week workout program and I was very impressed by how much weight I lost and how my body changed in such a short time. 12 weeks is a short time, when compared to how long I spent talking about doing something about my weight.

As I wrote last year, and discussed at great length in previous posts, in twelve weeks I lost 20 pounds and 15 1/2 inches overall and was feeling great. However, when the program ended, when I no longer was obliged to attend regular workouts under the watchful gaze of a coach, I stopped working out regularly.

Sure I worked out, but no longer 3 to 6 times a week like I did during the program. If a week went by and I didn't go to the club, I'd chalk it off to being really busy. If a month went by, I would tell myself it was okay because I stretched a few times at home.

The result was that since the program ended 10 months ago, and I gave my testimonial and took my beautiful "after" pictures, I put back on seven pounds. That is almost a pound a month. You do the math and figure out where I would be in two years, or five years. No, can't have that again. The yo-yo effect is a very real phenomenon that people who struggle with their weight have to deal with. I have dealt with it all my life. I have a small frame, but if I am not careful, I can pack on the pounds really quickly.

Fortunately the size 31 pants I bought still fit, and the seven pounds don't show a lot, but I knew I had to do something.

The key to success in making changes in your life like weight loss or working out are commitment and accountability. It has to be to yourself, first and foremost, but getting others involved can be very helpful.

For example: Last week I worked out two days in a row, and I felt good, so I decided to extend that and see if I couldn't make a big change again in my toning. I decided that I would workout thirty days in a row, just for the hell of it, to see what happens. Would I lose weight? Would I tone my abs again? It was worth a try, as no matter what happened I had nothing to lose and everything to gain. (Or seven pounds to lose and abs to gain).

Then I was talking to a friend of mine, and it hit me, what if I suggest he do the same thing; that he join me in a thirty day workout? That way we could feel a sense of community and responsibility to ourselves and each other. Communities and groups tend to create a strong motivation that gives a person the courage and the strength to do things that they may not succeed at on their own. It doesn't matter that he lives in Chicago and I live in Los Angeles, we could chart our progress and encourage each other.

I know when I was a teenager I felt that at the Weight Watcher meetings I attended. When the leader announced how much weight each member lost to the group, and you got applause for it, it was a strong and positive affirmation. And last year, I felt that in the group program. A feeling of competition, encouragement and connection.

If I said I was going to workout for thirty days, and I told no one, who would call me on it if I missed a day? No one. If a man is alone in the woods and doesn't do his push-ups, does it still add calories? That makes no sense, but I knew if I had to report to someone that I had done my workout I would be more motivated.

So every Monday for the next five week I will report to you, dear reader, my progress of working out everyday for 30 days. Specifically, no matter what else I do; run, swim, weight training, etc, I have to do 200 ab crunches and 50 push-ups a day for the next 30 days. As the days go on, if I decide to increase the numbers I can, that is just a minimum.

You are my motivation. Its a win-win situation.

So, if this makes you think that maybe you too would like to shed a few pounds before summer, and help your self get back in shape, then why don't you call a friend, make a commitment, and just get started. What have you got to lose?

Oh, by the way, since I completed the program last year I have retained most of the gains I made in muscle mass and at almost 49 years old, I can honestly say I have never been in better shape in my life. I remember I once tried out for the football team in high school and at the first workout I couldn't do one push-up. Some girls laughed at me. Now I can do a set of twenty no problem.

Here in Los Angeles, trying to make it as an actor means I have to do everything I can to make myself standout over thousands of other actors all going for the same job. Confidence is important, and so is backing it up with a certain look. I want to be the strong 50 year old who could have been a strong twenty year old. No one has to know I was ever fat, or weak, or carried an extra 70 pounds on me. No, I can be the tough old guy, which is a role I prefer over aging paunchy fat guy.

And the camera adds weight anyway, so being a little overweight really shows on camera, as opposed to being really toned and buff.

Vain? Maybe a little, but I have a career at stake here. I am a performer, and as such, I have to make myself look good. No, better than good. Great.

What are you going to do today?

Blind Ed

Two posts in one day?

Well, it's been a few weeks since I did my shoot on the "adult feature" Pirates II. It was such a fun day. I was treated very well, I worked with really interesting people, and I thought I did a great job.

My role, a comedic character who helps the hero along on his journey, was really fun to shoot. Wearing a latex eye patch over one eye and a "blind" contact lens in the other was interesting, but not comfortable at all. Here is what I looked like:




The makeup department did an awesome job.

It was a really professional shoot. The crew was top notch. The wardrobe, sets, and costumes matched any studio production I've ever been on. Joone, the director, really knew what he wanted and how to get it. I just had a blast. I can't wait to see it. And I hope I get invited to the premiere. That will be one fun party.

Word on the set was that Pirates II may get an R rated release, which would mean a lot of people might see this movie, and me. I hope so. I have three films still in the can, all set to be released this year. It could be a big year!

Patriotism

What is Patriotism? What is love of country? Is it simply and easily wearing an American Flag lapel pin?

Some weeks ago there was an uproar in the press, started by the right, against Barack Obama for not wearing a flag pin on his lapel.

Ridiculous, I know, but Americans like to get caught up in these childish pursuits.

For my self, I don't care whether or not a person wears a flag pin or not, though to be honest, the sight of a flag pin on someone's lapel makes me less trusting of that person, not more so.

But I would like to ask you this; where was that lapel pin made? I would wager it was made in China. And so by wearing an American flag lapel pin made in another country, you are supporting the outsourcing of jobs FROM America, the transfer of wealth OUT of America, the exploitation of workers across the world, and letting corporations get away with making massive profits and not pay taxes here in the states.

Thats what I think of your flag lapel pin.